So, I was on the MGTOW Reddit page and I came across this article:
So, this got me thinking.
Is there a male equivalent to a crazy cat lady?
And if I’m actually talking about this on my channel is it time I went and found a real job?
Anyway, let’s get into the “analysis”.
Now, just for some clarification, when I say crazy cat lady, I’m being silly, or maybe just facetious. I don’t mean the crazy cat lady like on the Simpsons. I mean those women who have given up on trying to find a long-term relationship with a suitable guy, and instead have chosen to seek connection and companionship with a pet of some sort as an alternative.
So, with this question, I think it depends on how you interpret the subtext. If the real question is “Do men respond to failing at their basic reproductive strategy by employing psychological coping mechanisms?”, then the answer is definitely yes. But if the underlying question is “do men apply the same coping mechanisms as a female who has failed at their basic reproductive strategy?”, then the answer is no.
Male and Female reproductive and mating strategies are different from one another, and it’s a topic covered extensively in evolutionary psychology and behavioural ecology. If you consider and contrast a woman’s mating strategy of locking the best quality male into a long term relationship and persuading him to invest resources into the raising of their offspring, versus the male sexual strategy of procuring life-long exclusive access to an unlimited number of fertile females willing to mate, it makes sense that a woman who has “failed” in her biological goal to secure a man to procreate and nest with would find comfort in the surrogate nurturing of a dependent animal, and a heterosexual male, who generally doesn’t have the same innate desire to nurture would behave completely differently.
Now, apparently studies have shown that when a male find himself sexually attracted to a female, it lights up the same parts of his brain associated with tool use. And the theory behind this is that men view their innate mating strategy as a problem that needs to be overcome, in much the same way that the use of tools help to overcome a problem, such as a leaky faucet or whatever. The male asks himself “How can I get this female to have sex with me?”.
So, when they fail repeatedly at this, their equivalent coping mechanism would be any behaviour that promotes a pursuance of goals, virtual or real, that gives him a feeling of purpose and accomplishment and overcoming obstacles.
So, you could argue that the equivalent of a “cat lady” is a guy who is unsuccessful in procuring ongoing casual sex. And then the coping behaviour that it creates is at its worst, the guy who sits in his basement playing computer games all day instead of trying to make his mark out in the real world.
To a degree you could also consider INCELS (involuntarily celibates) to be an equivalent in part I guess, however these guys are the extreme, and a large part of their coping strategy involves banding together online and blaming women for their ineffectiveness. And these guys are just pathetic in my view, because they’re not interested in doing anything or taking responsibility to improve themselves and their real goal is to maintain their position as the victim, which is just a shit way to go through life. Yes, there are girls that have the equivalent attitude towards men, and they’re usually pretty easy to spot.
But in a lot of cases it’s a good idea for guys and girls to take time out from pursuing the opposite sex. Wanting to take a break almost always comes about as a result of emotional trauma, such as a bad breakup, and there doesn’t need to be a time limit on how long you choose to be celibate or remove yourself from the dating market. It’s obviously totally up to you. It provides a great opportunity to focus on achieving real life goals and dreams, creating the best version of yourself and practise benevolence. And I suppose we’re talking about MGTOW here or Men (and Women) Going Their Own Way, and the female equivalent WGTOW.